Wednesday, February 08, 2006

"Let's Be Friends!" - No, let's not!

Why do people seem to think it's ok to try to solicit money from you at your place of business? I can't tell you how often I get salespeople walking into our office trying to sell me jewelry, paintings, toys, books, pillows (yes, pillows!), spa name it, someone has come into my office and tried to sell it to me. There is a big sign on the front doors of the building I work in that clearly says "No soliciting". What part of that do people not understand? And then they seem really offended when I refuse to let them walk through our office trying to peddle their junk.

"Well, can you at least ask to see if anyone is interested?"

"No I can't"

"Why not?"

"Because this is an office. My boss is paying us to work, not shop."

But the guy who just came into our office about ten minutes ago takes the cake. I'm sure we've all been approached by these people. I've got files all over my desk, there's a stack of mail in front of me, the phone is ringing as always, (so it's very obvious that I'm busy) and this very well-dressed man walks into the office and literally shoves a card under my nose while I'm on the phone. The card reads:

"Hi, I'm deaf. Let's be friends. Can you spare a few dollars?"

You have got to be fucking kidding me, right?

a) You're deaf, not an invalid. There's no reason you can't work at an actual job instead of going around asking other people to donate money simply because you can't hear. I could understand if maybe you were asking people to help you out because you're going through an especially difficult time, we've all been there, but you want me to give you money simply because you're deaf? I think not.

b) You're wearing a Tommy Hilfiger sweater and very nice leather jacket. I'm wearing 3 year old pants that I bought at Winners and a hand-me-down shirt. Obviously, asking people to be your friend because you're deaf pays well. Perhaps I should consider changing occupations.

c) I'm at work. "No soliciting" You're deaf, not blind. Also, could you at least wait until I'm off the phone before you start harrassing me for money?

d) Judging by the fact that you gave me a dirty look and walked off in a huff when I shook my head, I'm guessing that you never really wanted to be friends in the first place. I'm heartbroken.

Perhaps the card should have read:

"Hi, I'm deaf. Let's be friends. Can you spare a few dollars, even though I clearly have more money then you and I don't even work for a living? If not, you're a filthy whore and I hope you die"